Batman And Friends Make Bad Guy Go Bye Bye In Zack Snyder's Square Movie

Warner Bros.

Mr. Zack Snyder has sure done it again. There’s another movie online and in theaters, but this time, it’s one that was in theaters a little while ago but different. That’s right: it’s a Justice League starring Bat Man and Super Man and Wonderwoman and Flash and Cyborg and Aqua Man and Flash. And guess what? This time, the shape is square.

The action packed blockbuster is packed with so much action that you better believe you’re gonna feel tired. But not to worry, the whole square is filled with a lot of moving shapes that are gray and fast and slow motion. While I was watching it my dog threw up and I had to clean it up and make sure he was okay. That took a while, but the movie was still going on when I finished. You have to admit it is made with a lot of heart. Yes, it is longer than other classics such as Gone With The Wind, and just as enjoyable too.

In Justice League Two, Mr. Snyder takes a movie that was different before, and made it again, but this time, with a smaller screen so there was less CGI to be done, but also longer, so there was more CGI also. There are also more bad guys. But that’s okay, because there are more heroes. Bruce, Clark, The Girl, and the Others. And it’s their job to make those bad guys, Dark Side and Steven Wolf (weird names!) go bye bye. So they do, with punches and lasers and teamwork.

Mr. Snyder’s Justice League carries the weight and complexity of a time after the World Wars and after Iraq, where people need not just the laughs, but the heroes too. But it’s not all darkness and drama. The Flash has some funny lines too — just like The Avengers, a movie made by the man who ruined the old Justice League, Mr. Josh Whedon.

What Mr. Josh Whedon took from us was that darkness and drama, replacing it with rectangles and computer generated images and cheap gags and fake feminism. He cowarded away from delivering the true heart that is at the center of the DC universe: Friendship.

Zack Snyder's Justice League

B
Type:
Money Grabbing Fan Service
Run Time:
4h 2m
Genre:
TWISTED
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