News
News

Entry Level Entertainment Job Requires 10 Years Experience As Director's Child

LOS ANGELES – An entry level production assistant job for a new horror film from director Alan Harrison required that...

'I’m In,' Announces 90s Movie Hacker During Sex

DENVER — “I’m in,” 90s movie hacker Elliot Barnes announced as he and recent acquaintance Kate Murphy writhed in...

Furious Lin-Manuel Miranda Bursts Through Wall After Local Teen Throws Away Shot

WICHITA, Kan. — Musical theater magnate Lin-Manuel Miranda erupted through the walls of high school cafeteria to...

Cash-Strapped AMC Opens Fifth Theater In Burbank

BURBANK, Calif. — In the company’s biggest territorial expansion in over a decade, AMC Entertainment has announced...

Martin Scorsese Takes Chance On Unknown Actor In Forthcoming Movie

NEW YORK — Further solidifying his status as a titan of the entertainment industry, legendary director Martin...

Fuck, Sitcom You Watched To Get Your Mind Off Of Things Just Got Really Sad

BOISE, Idaho — Throwing a depressing curveball at its audience, the quirky sitcom that you started watching to take...

New Netflix True Crime Docuseries Spends Eight Episodes Not Finding Out Who Did It

DILLWEED, Ill. — Over the course of eight long, one hour episodes, new Netflix docuseries, Kids: Missing? takes a...

Marvel Reveals ‘Deadpool 3’ Will Break Fifth Wall By Sending Ryan Reynolds To Watch With You

LOS ANGELES — Squeezing every possible penny out of their raunchiest cinematic property, Marvel announced Monday...

Oscars Signal Return To Normalcy By Snubbing Actors Of Color

HOLLYWOOD, Calif. — Audiences were treated to a glimpse of pre-pandemic normalcy during last night’s 93rd Academy...

Ricky Gervais Mutters Cheeky Oscars Banter Alone On Couch

LONDON — Breathing a sigh of relief, audiences watched the biggest names in Hollywood celebrate the 93rd Academy...

Diehard Marxist Forces Friends To Watch ‘Horse Feathers,’ ‘Duck Soup’

MEMPHIS – Self-proclaimed “Marxist” Donnie Scott continued to misunderstand the meaning of that word when he demanded...

Oh Fuck, Guy Thinks They Should Make An ‘Infinite Jest’ Movie

CONSHOHOCKEN, Pa. — A group of friends’ genial discussion about their favorite movies came to a screeching halt when...